Why the Nuggets suck

This is in response to a comment made on the previous article. You can read it, but it was written by the one person who can actually read in Colorado, so it’s very unintelligible and not worth reading. But it was so easy to prove wrong, I couldn’t help myself.

Yes, you are “right”–it sure is “boring” to watch my team win consecutive Northwest Division title; it sure is “boring” to watch my team actually advance in the playoffs; it sure is “boring” to watch a team that averages over 100 points per game in the regular season; it sure is “boring” to watch my team humiliate Denver when they play the Nuggets. Also, it was pretty “boring” to see the Jazz twice in the NBA finals in the late 1990s–a place the Nuggets have never gone (In fact, Denver has only been to the conference finals twice since joining the NBA vs. the six trips the Jazz have made).

See, it’s your kind of thinking that makes the Nuggets, well, the Nuggets, a team that has consistenly been inferior to the Jazz ever since the Jazz relocated to Salt Lake. You think, “Carmelo’s one of the Top 5 scorers in the league; therefore, he must be one of the five best players in the league.” Well, any ballhog can score. The measure of a truly great player is whether he makes his teammates better and whether he succeeds in the playoffs. Does Carmelo Anthony make his teammates better? No. His team is a bunch of underachievers; a lot of nice pieces who combine to suck. While it’s true Carmelo and the Nuggets have made the playoffs every year since he got there, look at what his team has done in the playoffs.

2004: Lost to Minnesota, 4-1
2005: Lost to San Antonio 4-1.
2006: Lost to the L.A. Clippers 4-1. The Clippers?! How do you lose to the Clippers?! And that badly?!
2007: Lost to San Antonio 4-1.
2008: Lost to the L.A. Lakers, 4-0.

Combined record: 4-20 or a winning percentage of .167. Wow! You Nugget fans must be so proud! It sounds like Carmelo Anthony really steps up in the playoffs. In fact, I heard A-game is short for Anthony-game. And despite going through a few rebuilding seasons in which Andrei Kirilenko was our best player, the Jazz have appeared in the Conference Finals during that period.

In fact the last time the Nuggets won a playoff series was in 1994 when Carmelo Anthony was 10 years old and thousands of miles away from the franchise he would one day ruin. The Jazz, by contrast, have won 15 playoff series in that span. I could go on, pointing out that the Jazz have won seven division titles to your two, and that Stockton-to-Malone and now Williams & Boozer have worked out much, much better than Iverson & ‘Melo ever have or ever will or how the Jazz have had just one losing season since 1983 compared to 13 for the Nuggets or how the Jazz have missed the playoffs just three times in that span against the Nuggets’ 11 misses or how when the Jazz won 64 games in 1998, the Nuggets won 11 (which makes the Nuggets’ 17-65 record in 2003 look like a winning season! … the good news is that compared to the 1998 team’s winning percentage of .134, the Nuggets’ playoffs winning percentage of .167 in the ‘Melo Era is actually not completely awful) or how the Jazz have eight division titles to Denver’s three in that span or or how the Jazz winning percentage since 1983 is about 20 points higher than the Nuggets or any other of a million statistics that proves thoroughly, exhaustibly and inarguably how much better the Utah Jazz franchise is than the one on the other side of the Rockies. You might as well be arguing that downtown Baghdad is a better place to visit than Honolulu.

So take your bet? Nah, I won’t. Not because the Nuggets will make the playoffs (they won’t; the West is too good especially with Portland and the Clippers on the rise; AI is aging, ‘Melo is not improving and the rest of their team plays sloppily), and not because it’s immoral and illegal (which it is), and not because gambling leads to people having to downgrade where they live (and, therefore, have to live in a hellhole like Colorado when they could be living in a heaven like Utah). But because you’ve suffered enough. After all, Dikembe Mutombo is one of the all-time greatest players ever to slip on a Nuggets uniform.

That’s when you know your franchise sucks.

So enjoy the $1,000 I’m letting you keep, and also enjoy watching the Clippers become a better franchise. In the meantime face the reality: Carmelo Anthony is a cheap, less effective knockoff of Tracy McGrady: He can score, but he can’t win.

P.S. Why are you such a big fan of armpit hair?

Jazz have most Olympic Dream Team selections of any team

The Utah Jazz are the team with most players on this year’s Olympic Dream team with two: Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer.

The selections of Williams and Boozer, however, also push the Jazz ahead of the Phoenix Suns for the most Olympic Dream Team selections of all time. The Jazz now have seven to the Suns’ five.

Think of this stat like this: There have been five teams, each had 12 spots; of those 60 spots, seven, or 12 percent of all rosters, went to Jazzmen. Also, of the 11 players selected to more than one Dream Team, three have been Jazz players: Boozer, Stockton and Malone. And Williams will almost certainly be on the 2012 team, so the Jazz have consistent superstars.

Of the five U.S. Olympic teams since the Dream Team was first put together in 1992, three of those teams have featured Jazz teammates (John Stockton and Malone in 1992 and 1996, and Williams and Boozer this year). In fact, only Boozer, then a newly-signed free agent, has represented the Jazz by himself at an Olympics, in 2004.

That the Jazz have had three teammates on Olympic Dream Teams is staggering, considering that only seven sets of teammates have even played on the Olympic team since 1992; meaning the Jazz own three of the seven teammate pairings in Olympic Dream Team history. (The other teammates who represented the U.S. in the Olympics were Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen of Chicago in 1992; Vin Baker and Gary Payton of Seattle in 2000; Tim Hardaway and Alonzo Mourning of Miami in 2000; and Amare Stoudemire and Shawn Marion of Phoenix in 2004).

Of the seven pairings, only Utah’s three pairings, along with Chicago’s and arguably the Phoenix’s are even legitimate. What were Tim Hardaway and Vin Baker doing in the Olympics anyway?

To put the three teams with Jazz teammates into perspective, consider this: Only nine NBA teams have had a total of at least three players represent them in the Olympics. And three teams–the Clippers, Wizards and Hawks–have never sent a player to the Olympics (although given those teams’ histories, that’s hardly surprising; Duke also has the distinction of having more Dream Team selections than any of these teams, since Christian Laettner was somehow chosen over Shaquille O’Neal to represent the college players on the original dream team. This statistic will no doubt give credence to the idea that Duke could beat the Hawks).

The only year the Jazz did not have a player on the Olympic team was in 2000, when the U.S. sent arguably its least star-studded team to the Olympics in a roster that included Baker, Steve Smith, Shareef Abdur-Rahim, Tim Hardaway, Antonio McDyess, and Allan Houston.

I know what you’re thinking … Steve Smith was on a Dream Team? Was Matt Harpring unavailable? And, yes, the 2000 team somehow won a gold medal, which has to be the biggest insult of all-time to the Europeans that a team with Steve Smith, Antonio McDyess and Vin Baker still won the gold medal.

And it raises the question of, how did the 2004 team lose? I blame LeBronze.

Some other surprising things about the Dream Teams:

• Michael Jordan, Shaquille O’Neal and Tim Duncan have both played in just one Olympics, which puts Abdur-Rahim and Smith somehow in their league.
• Stephon Marbury was an Olympian four years ago? Maybe I shouldn’t be so quick to blame LeBronze.
• Really? Tim Hardaway in 2000? Really? Those shoe commercials had to be at least eight years old by then?
• Sacramento has had one Olympian. Naturally, you would think it was Chris Webber. You’d be wrong. It was Mitch Richmond, whose only real value was being decent enough that Washington decided that giving up Chris Webber for him was a good idea.
• Milwaukee has more selections than Boston does?
• Of the players selected to the Dream Team twice, Jason Kidd is the only one selected in nonconsecutive Olympics. And he is also the only one to switch teams between selections. He was with Phoenix when he was chosen in 2000, and is now with Dallas as he goes to represent the U.S. in 2008. Yeah, and in between, he had an entire career with the Nets.
• Can a Dream Team be a “Dream Team” if it features Antonio McDyess?
• Of the 11 players selected to two Olympics, Carmelo Anthony is by far the weakest player.
• Five of the original Dream Team were on the 1996 team. Only one player (Gary Payton) from the 1996 team was on the 2000 squad, and no player from the 2000 lineup was on the 2004 entry. But this year, four players from the 2004 team (Boozer, James, Wade and Anthony) are again on the team.
• And how has Jerry Sloan never coached the Dream Team?

OLYMPIC DREAM TEAM SELECTIONS BY TEAM

ATLANTA [0]: None

BOSTON [1]: Larry Bird, 1992

CHARLOTTE [1]: Emeka Okafor, 2004

CHICAGO [3]: Michael Jordan, 1992; Scottie Pippen, 1992 & 1996

CLEVELAND [2]: LeBron James, 2004 & 2008

DALLAS [1]: Jason Kidd, 2008

DETROIT [2]: Grant Hill, 1996; Tayshaun Prince, 2008

DENVER [3]: Antonio McDyess, 2000; Carmelo Anthony, 2004 & 2008

DUKE UNIV.[1]: Christian Laettner, 1992

GOLDEN STATE [1]: Chris Mullin, 1992.

HOUSTON [1]: Hakeem Olajuwon, 1996.

INDIANA [1]: Reggie Miller, 1996.

L.A. CLIPPERS [0]: None

L.A. LAKERS [3]: Magic Johnson, 1992; Shaquille O’Neal, 1996; Kobe Bryant, 2008

MIAMI [4]: Tim Hardaway, 2000; Alonzo Mourning, 2000; Dwyane Wade, 2004 & 2008

MILWAUKEE [2]: Ray Allen, 2000; Michael Redd, 2008

MINNESOTA [1]: Kevin Garnett, 2000

NEW JERSEY [1]: Richard Jefferson, 2004

NEW ORLEANS [1]: Chris Paul, 2008

NEW YORK [3]: Patrick Ewing, 1992; Allan Houston, 2000; Stephon Marbury, 2004.

ORLANDO [2]: Anfernee Hardaway, 1996; Dwight Howard, 2008

PHILADELPHIA [1]: Allen Iverson, 2008.

PHOENIX [5]: Charles Barkley, 1992 & 1996; Jason Kidd, 2000; Shawn Marion, 2004; Amare Stoudemire, 2004

PORTLAND [2]: Clyde Drexler, 1992; Steve Smith, 2000

SACRAMENTO [1]: Mitch Richmond, 1996

SAN ANTONIO [3]: David Robinson, 1992 & 1996; Tim Duncan, 2004.

SEATTLE [3]: Gary Payton, 1996 & 2000; Vin Baker, 2000.

TORONTO [2]: Vince Carter, 2000; Chris Bosh, 2008

UTAH [7]: Karl Malone, 1992 & 1996; John Stockton, 1992 & 1996; Carlos Boozer, 2004 & 2008; Deron Williams, 2008.

WASHINGTON [0]: None

VANCOUVER/MEMPHIS [1]: Shareef Abdur-Rahim, 2000

TOP THREE

1. Utah 7
2. Phoenix 5
3. Miami 4

Three-selection teams: Chicago, Denver, L.A. Lakers, New York, San Antonio, Seattle

Two-selection teams: Cleveland, Milwaukee, Orlando, Portland, Toronto

One-selection teams: Boston, Charlotte, Dallas, Duke, Golden State, Houston, Indiana, Memphis/Vancouver, Minnesota, New Jersey, New Orleans, Philadelphia, Sacramento,

Zero seletion teams: Atlanta, L.A. Clippers, Washington

TEAMMATES AT THE OLYMPICS

Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen, Chicago, 1992
Karl Malone and John Stockton, Utah, 1992
Karl Malone and John Stockton, Utah, 1992
Gary Payton and Vin Baker, Seattle, 2000
Tim Hardaway and Alonzo Mourning, Miami, 2000
Shawn Marion and Amare Stoudemire, Phoenix, 2004
Carlos Boozer and Deron Williams, Utah, 2008

PLAYERS WITH MULTIPLE SELECTIONS

Carmelo Anthony, Denver, 2004 & 2008
Charles Barkley, Phoenix, 1992 & 1996
Carlos Boozer, Utah, 2004 & 2008
LeBron James, Cleveland, 2004 & 2008
Jason Kidd, Phoenix & Dallas, 2000 & 2008
Karl Malone, Utah, 1992 & 1996
Gary Payton, Seattle, 1996 & 2000
Scottie Pippen, Chicago, 1992 & 1996
David Robinson, San Antonio, 1992 & 1996
John Stockton, Utah, 1992 & 1996
Dwyane Wade, Miami, 2004 & 2008

PLAYERS WITH MULTIPLE SELECTIONS

Carmelo Anthony, Denver, 2004 & 2008
Charles Barkley, Phoenix, 1992 & 1996
Carlos Boozer, Utah, 2004 & 2008
LeBron James, Cleveland, 2004 & 2008
Jason Kidd, Phoenix & Dallas, 2000 & 2008
Karl Malone, Utah, 1992 & 1996
Gary Payton, Seattle, 1996 & 2000
Scottie Pippen, Chicago, 1992 & 1996
David Robinson, San Antonio, 1992 & 1996
John Stockton, Utah, 1992 & 1996
Dwyane Wade, Miami, 2004 & 2008

Letter to Tracy McGrady

Dear Tracy,

 

We’ll send you a postcard from the second round. Let you know what it’s like.

 

Love,

 

The Utah Jazz

Baron Davis Cements His Position as the Cheapest Player in the NBA

As if taking cheap shots at his “friend” Derek Fisher in last year’s playoffs wasn’t enough:

Five-year future of the Northwest Division

The news was a little devastating to the Utah Jazz when the NBA Lottery, for the top picks in a draft with two big-time players, was won by two division rivals: The Portland Trail Blazers and the Seattle Super Sonics.

Having Greg Oden and Kevin Durant in the division caused an immediate threat to the dynasty that the Jazz seemed to be building with a team full of young superstars. With Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer, the Jazz seemed destined to win Northwest Division title after Northwest Division title, particulary as the Nuggets’ Allen Iverson aged because Carmelo Anothony has already he proven he can’t carry Denver on his own. Meanwhile, Minnesota shipped the only star player they’ve ever had to Boston, and the T-Wolves are years away from being serious.

That left the Jazz as the only team with a future in the Northwest Division.

And, then, Portland and Seattle won the lottery. Here’s a look at how the division foes should stack up against the Jazz in years to come:

 SEATTLE

The idea of a sonics team featuring Ray Allen, Rashard Lewis and Kevin Durant was indeed fearsome. But Allen got traded and Lewis left via free agency. And early returns on Durant aren’t good. He’s struggling, particularly when facing tall defenders, such as Andrei Kirilenko. He’ll need to improve significantly to be a formidable player in this league. The Sonics are unquestionably a lesser team this year, and it appears they have no immediate answers for the future–except that they no longer want to be in Seattle. Their only hope is that Durant develops.

Future Forecast: Bleak with a 45 percent chance of moderate

DENVER

The Nuggets realistically are looking at two or three good years with the Iverson-Anthony combination. They have good players surrounding. If they were in the East, they could challenge the Celtics for the conference, one would think. But then, you have to remember how they played in Boston the other night … In the West, they could challenge the Jazz for the division, one would think. But then, you have to remember how the Iverson-Anthony combo lost significant ground to the Jazz at the end of last season. 

Future Forecast: Good turning to crap.

Minnesota

How many good moves have the T-Wolves made in their history? Not many. Their best move was to draft Kevin Garnett. That they could never build a legitimate contender around him is a testament to Kevin McHale’s ineptness. Pre-Garnett, the T-Wolves were a perennial lottery team. Post-Garnett, expect more of the same. They didn’t get enough for Garnett to build a future where they can even contend for a playoff spot in the West.

 Future Forecast: Abysmal to Bleak

Portland

The big question with the Blazers is Oden’s health. If he’s a perennial injured reserve guy–and there’s reason to believe he will be, Portland will struggle. But the Blazers have some excellent young players in Brandon Roy and LaMarcus Aldridge. They’re going to struggle for a bit, but expect the Blazers to work their way into the playoffs and then potentially evolve into a contender if Oden stays healthy.

Future Forecast: Struggling to Playoffs

The Jazz

The prime issue in Utah is keeping some of the young talent. Clearly, they absolutely must re-sign Deron Williams and Paul Millsap. They need to have Boozer long-term. Okur and Kirilenko are expendable if we find like talents, but they are under contract enough to contribute to a perennial playoff power. Ronnie Brewer’s improved play makes the Jazz an instant contender.

Future Forecast: May to June–a championship contender.

As of now, here is how I see the next five seasons finishing up in the Northwest Division:

2007-08

1. Utah

2. Denver

3. Portland

4. Minnesota

5. Seattle

2008-09

1. Utah

2. Denver

3. Portland

4. Oklahoma City*

5. Minnesota

2009-2010

1. Utah

2. Portland

3. Denver

4. Oklahoma City

5. Minnesota

2010-11

1. Utah

2. Portland

3. Oklahoma City

4. Denver

5. Minnesota

2011-2012

1. Utah

2. Portland

3. Oklahoma City

4. Minnesota

5. Denver

5 Early Season Observations About the Utah Jazz

Six games into the season, I offer these five observations:

1) Jason Hart is not the answer as backup point guard. Does anyone have Dee Brown on speed dial? Hart is shooting 11% from the field and the team looks listless and disorganized when he is running the point. Two immediate alternatives are first, seeing what Ronnie Price can do as the backup or, second, letting Andrei Kirilenko play point guard for the eight minutes a game that Deron Williams is not playing.

2) Ronnie Brewer is the answer as the starting shooting guard. Brewer has been phenomenal in the first six games. He plays within the offense and is intense on defense, ranking third in the NBA in steals per game. Brewer is a great finisher around the basket and is averaging a stellar 16 points per game. He’s even made three baskets from beyond the 3-point arc.

3) Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer are All-Stars. If there was any doubt whether the duo could keep up the brilliance they displayed in last season’s playoff run, that has been put to bed. Both should represent in this year’s All-Star game. If Baron “I play for myself” Davis makes the All-Star team instead of Williams, that will be a travesty.

4) Paul Millsap needs more minutes. Seriously, did Jerry Sloan see the game against Cleveland? Millsap looked like an All-Star. Then last night at Seattle, he gets 17 minutes! Millsap needs at least 30 minutes a game.

5) These players need fewer minutes: Jason Hart (should get 0 minutes), Gordan Giricek (adds nothing unique to the team) and Matt Harpring (great player but would rather see Millsap in the game).